Olympics 2010 - Men's Figure Skating

CONGRATS, EVAN LYSACEK on the GOLD MEDAL!!! First US Man since Brian Boitano (back in 1988) to win a figure skating gold medal!

Most of the men like to show off and prove their uber stregnth and yadda yadda yadda (typical males) and try a QUAD in their program, which is 4 revolutions. In the men's program, you are required to do triples. Most can safely land triples. Same in the women's competition.
The past few Olympics, alotta these guys started throwing quads in. If you land a quad, you could win and get extra points. But the problem is..... most of these guys, from Nagano, to Salt Lake City, to Torino to Vancouver now, DO NOT land the quads and DONT even land them in practice.

There were 3 Japanese competitors in these games. All 3 of them tried the quad. NONE of them landed it. I don't remember if Evan Lysacek did a quad. Johnny Weir had a quad Toe Loop (the easiest jump but i think all the guys do this jump as a quad) but Scott Hamilton (Long Time Commentator, Olympic Champion from 1984, professional skater, and Stars on Ice creator) said it was up to his COACH, Galina Zmievskaya whether Johnny would do the quad. Yevgeny Plushenko did it and LANDED it! But... he made alot of mistakes along the way. His jumps were off center and he landed them all but I think he lost points because of the revolutions being off. He probably wouldn't have gotten the Silver Medal if he DIDNT do the quad, so in this case, the quad helped. The others... they should've left it out.


The final standings for the men were: Evan Lysacek - gold, Yevgeny Plushenko - Silver, and Daisuke Takahashi - Bronze.

Yevgeny looks pissed that he didnt' win. He won gold in the LAST olympics in Torino. Daisuke seemed happy about his Bronze medal (thats the spirit!). He even had to stop his program cuz his lace came undone, and he had to fix it and resume in the middle. Kinda like Tonya Harding did in Lillehammer in 1994 if anyone remembers. Yevgeny couldve like pretended he was happy until he got backstage ya know....

Here is Evan's coach, Frank Carroll, who also coached Michelle Kwan, the 1998 Olympic Silver Medalist, US Champion, World Champion and 2002 Bronze Olympic Medalist. He barely cracked a smile.

All this talk about men's figure skating just wouldn't be entertaining if we didn't have some pizazz, and flamboyance, right? Well here it is.....

Johnny Weir.... need I say more. lol

Fabulous pose. Johnny weir is gayer than the Gay Pride Parade, but it's all good. You can't NOT like Johnny. He's just so......fab! He is into all things Russian (he may be part russian, not sure), and he seems like a nice guy. He's outspoken, and is himself. Thats why I like him. He doesn't do those pre rehearsed comments like the other skaters do. He says what he thinks. Johnny was gonna retire but decided not to and he made it here. He did not do a quad, his program was great to me, but the judges placed him 5th. Big surprise to me, the audience and the commentators, Scott Hamilton and Peggy Flemming (1968 Olympic Champion).

TRIVIA! Johnny's coach is Galina Zmievskaya who coached 2 Ukrainian Olympic Champions....

Oksana Baiul - Lillehammer 1994 Gold Medalist. (She's still my fave even tho' she's a little weird now)

And Viktor Petrenko - 1992 Albertville Gold Medalist. I used to have a crush on him from like 1992 to I dunno, whenever he stopped skating professionally.Probably late 90s. I saw him with Galina Zmievskaya and Johnny Weir last night and he still looks good. And he's like in his 40s now. Poifect! haha. He's actually not gay (for the ppl who think all male figure skaters are gay). Some are some arent.

So thats all for my recap/commentary on the men's competition. The women's competition starts Tuesday night (fuck I have band rehearsal!!!!) and has the medal event Thursdsay (fuck I have an Anatomy Lecture!!!!!!!!!!) but hopefully I can get a delayed cast. i know they rerun it at 1am or 2am. For skating, I WILL stay up and watch it.

My fave for the Women's event is actually NOT from the USA. I want Yu Na Kim from South Korea to win. She's been my fave skater recently. Her rivals are Mao Asada, Carolina Kostner, and maybe Rachel Flatt and Marai Nagasu. I'm not sure who else got to the olympics from the other countries yet. I'll see when they show it. Yu Na could take it all. But she has consistancy problems. I'll do a recap of that event too.

Yu Na Kim. Possible 2010 Olympic Champion???


**** The paragraphs running together is really getting on my nerves. I go in and edit it and it doesn't take. I tried editing the html part too and it wont take either. Gonna complain. lol

Poverty here I come! Well here I shall stay I mean.

Today was a bad day. I went to UE to find out for sure what my claim was gonna do next. I needed to come up with a plan. I have an $8000 extension sitting there for the income level I make now (barely makin' it).But my claim renewal date is approaching (April 6). last year I had to renew my claim insted of take the extension I had. This year its different. All I did was TEMP.

I temped for shit pay. Cuz well, thats what temping pays. So UE is 60% of that shit pay. I waited at the UE office for 3hrs. I was about to leave cuz there was 100 ppl in front of me, but in the end decided to stay. I talked to the wonderkind, Patrick, a nice guy who works ther who can override the system and he'll actually help you, rather than tell you TOUGH like the rest of em do. I was hoping I'd get to talk to Patrick. He was my onlyhope. there was a spanish lady there too who was a bitch. I didnt want to talk to her. She doesn't go out of her way to help like Patrick does.

I got called and I did have Patrick. I explained my situ and he kept flipping thru tons of screens and he was doing math out loud. I hoped that'd be a good sign. He said "ok ..." in a good tone, hoping that maybe he was gonna help me.

Then he goes "You can't take your first extension. The government wants people off the extensions cuz its federal money. Youo are elegible for a new claim since you've worked (temped) and you have to take what they give you." I was shocked. I said "what about that $8000 I have sitting there?! Its gonna go to waste?!". He said, "basically, yeah. You have to take the new claim. Its federal rules. We can't tamper with it." I was in a state of panic, knowing how little i got paid as a temp, thinking my claim was gonna be $300 a week or so. Which I couldn't live on. I asked him if there was any way he could tell what I was gonna make on my new claim. He said yeah and he said they use all of 2009's income. I was gonna make....


$279 a week.



I think i said something like "WHOA" or something lielk that like i got shot in the stomach by a sniper. It was a huge blow. I Knew theres no way i can live on so little money. No way. I got up so quickly and walked out. Panicking. I knew there was no hope at all now. I was gonna be in poverty longer. Much deeper into poverty.

Shit's hard. Money's tight. I try to see my friends and enjoy life if I can swing it cuz at this point, its all I have. There'll be no more of that. I probably won't be able to drive much anymore. Def wont be able to go out w/ friends unless its someone's house. I walked to my car in a state of defeat.

They beat me. I lost the battle.

I can't believe things are going this way. I dont' know whats next. Short of a miracle, theres no hope. This is where I am now. Cuz I sure the hell dont' feel like talking.

i did the math and found out that the federal poverty level is $10,000 and change. I'll be making $7,000 and change. I will be living under the poverty level at 30yrs old. But won't qualify for help cuz there are alotta people poorer than me (who have kids). I never thought that THIS would be my life.

All I can do now is hope for a miracle. Cuz I'm all out of ideas and for once I dont' have a plan. I always have one. But today I was defeated by the government. Thanks, Uncle Sam. *flips off*

People who know me know i'm "anti drug" and barely take an advil unless I have a splitting migraine or something but tonight, I am gonna fill my Rx for Xanax. Shit that I usually sell for 10x the price to other people. I'm about to call the pharmacy now to have them fill it. Its gonna be rough from here on out and I'm overstressed as I'm writing this. Luckally I'm so not an addictive person and dont enjoy feelig like a vegetable so Xanax is only for rough nights.

Running works better than a drug. Problem is its snowing and its slushy. If it wasn't I'd be going for a jog instead of resorting to the American way to solve problems by popping a pill. *bah*

Ghetto Supermarket pays off!

Dolla dolla bill, yo!

Since I'm still in the same situation and will have to learn to live like this long term (since the economy isn't getting any better, and the wait for nursing school is 2yrs from March (the date of the info session), I have realized that I have to just learn to live as the poor do. I've been pretty poor for the past 3 1/2 years on and off, with an 8moth stint of middleclass-dom. I love food, and I like to cook new things, and try new recipes that end up being costly.

I have a culinary album on facebook, where I just take pictures of some food, and I try to arrange it Top Chef style, although I lack the Top Chef Culinary education. Lately the album hasn't had many new updates due to my small grocery budget. It seems like I'm ALWAYS buying groceries. I used to spend $150 a month on groceries (which includes toilet paper, cleaning products, toiletries, shampoo and conditioner and contact lens stuff). Now I have to spend less if I want to have ANY kind of social life and want to be able to get takeout on really busy nights when I'm too tired to cook. Something's gotta be cut to make that happen.

I used to shop at Foodtown since their meat prices were decent. Recently my neighbor told me about the supermarket in Asbury Park. She said the meat is REALLY cheap there and I should check it out. She shops for a fam of 4. Me, just one. But still. One day when I was really broke (I think I had 11 bucks) I went to the ghetto supermarket and saw how much meat I could buy for the money. The meat looked decent. I've eaten stuff there before and I'm still alive, not sick so.... *shrug* I guess its ok. Some of the other things are lower quality though. The veggies and stuff like that. There aren't as many options as a regular supermarket either. They have some weird shit from Mexico, and South America that I've never heard of. Lots of latino candy and cookies and breads too. Most of the store is latino stuff. So the American products take a backseat. Most of the patrons pay with WIC (food stamps) so there are long lines at the checkout. But its worth it.

Normally the shopping I did today wouldve cost me around 70 dollars. Today my total was $53. I got ALOT of food. My cabinets and fridge are more stocked than theyve ever been!!! I'm happy that I found a way to get more food for my money, since I don't qualify for food stamps.

May not look like alot to you people who are married w/ kids, or who live with your parents, but for one person, this is ALOT of food. All for $53! I had pretty much nothing before this except some stuff in the fridge door, and the sauces and spices on the left side of my cabinet.

I can't wait til I can afford better stuff again but I expect to remain poor for a long time based on how things are going.


Note: The first picture in this entry of Fine Fare is actually in Inwood in Manhattan where I used to live. Inwood is at the border of Washington Heights and The top of the island of Manhattan.

School Update - if you really care.

Haha, yeah like anyone really gives two shits about school, but it might be cool to read this years later and laugh. I usually do when I read shit I wrote years ago back on Live Journal. So I finished my first semester back at school. I did pretty good. I got all As and Bs and one C. Guess what subject? ALGEBRA! Ha... thats literally the best I can do tho'. I am horrible at math of any kind. In High School, I didn't do so great. But I didn't CARE. I hated school. I was more interested in figure skating, marching band, or the many other music programs I was in. School was just in the way. It was something I had to do, reluctantly. My old phrase I used to always say "Why go to school?! Its not like you get paid to go!" If I were paid I'd def go more! I guess now that its college, I'M paying for it (albeit on loans, I do have to pay them back in 3yrs), so I am more serious. Also, I'm going to school, NOT cuz its the norm and everyone does it, not to fuck around and party (damn, i'm gonna be 30 in 5 months now c'mon!), but to get a new , stable career, since I guess my marketing and finance career paths have hit dead ends. Maybe if the economy didn't crash I'd sitll be in one of those industries, but.. it did, so here I am.

Oh, and I saw on NJN news that the unemployment rate is UP once again. 100,000 new jobless claims were opened. Lovely. Doesn't seem to be looking up anytime soon. I need to switch careers now more than ever!

I am now working at Monmouth University, for a while. Nothing goes too long. I'm there til Jan 29th. Then looking for the next one. I work w/ 18-23yr olds. I'm the oldest one there. Its a minimum wage job. Its a cashier. I'm so embarassed. Its really doing nothing but going towards my yearly $1500 I must make to continue getting unemployemnt (regardless whether I have money in my pool,which I do, I have to make that money). It is also pocket money for moi. I am planning on getting my hair did tomorrow. I am just getting a maintenence cut. Not getting it did for any occasion. That reminds me, I gotta find a pic.

I went to my own school today because I was only able to take 3 classes this semester and I really wanted to take the maximum course load (even tho it will kill me, its worth it in the end). I left my days completely open for working possibilities,but am doubtful I'll find anything. If I do, I don't see it as being that long running. My courses meet more than once a week and its a full schedule, but what am I gonna do during the days? Sleep? Um, no. I don't want to fall into night owl mode again, never seeing the sun. I wanted to add two more courses. Maybe online ones. This way I can do it when I have time. Either days or on Fri or Sun when I'm off. I went to the school and waited for 2hrs to see a counselor to approve my classes and I decided to take music appreciation as my HUMANITIES that is required. There is also a course called humanities too. I'm not exactly sure how music appreciation is a humanties course,but whatever. I figure I go to the symphony all the time anyway. I'm musically educated since age 9, why NOT use it to my advantage? So I did. The problem? I don't know what to do in an online course. Oh and it cost $559!!!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?! Thank god for financial aid but.. I have to pay all this back. Idon't even want to THINK about this now....

Speaking of music.... get a load of this shit ^. WTF is that?! Is that even REAL?! It looks like an entire score on one staff!I don't know how anyone can read that. I think its prob fake, cuz some of the groups of whole notes form shapes on the staff and that just doesn't happen. But regardless I was just drawn to that picture cuz of it's ridiculousness. But I APPRECIATE it. Hence music appreciation I guess. *shrug*

I didn't even get the books yet. The bookstore is only open Mon-Fri 9-5. WTF? What about night students?! Thats not fair! So I haven't gotten any. Working at Monmouth U, I noticed the books there are so exp and some courses ask for more than one book. I really hope mybooks aren't supa expensive. I may ask my dad if he'll pay for them so I can pocket the rest of my financial aid as my safetly umbrella-ella-ella cuz my UE claim renews soon and usually you go a month w/ no income during a renewal. Its really rough. Really. I'm actually stressed about that right now. =/ Last time I almost got evicted when i went that long w/ no income. My fin aid can pay the rent for 3mo if I get what I think I'm gona get back. Let's hope! *crosses fingers*

So I'm gonna start school again next week. Its gonna be a rough semester. Very rough. But I really wanna be done with school. I'm too old to be there and tired of dealing with the immaturity that are 18yr olds making fart noises, and other things kids do.

Also, other happenings in my life are as follows. I apprarenly have 2 cavities. I went to the dentist this summer when I was insured w/ the shitty temp insurance. They didn't see any cavities. Unless these are new, I wish I could yell at those people and thank them for wasting my money. I got tests done at the county clinic (since I'm now back to insurancelessness again) and the dentist accidentally cut my gum open. She sent me home and it got infected. I called to bitch. They wantd to charge me to come back in. I bitched some more and said it was HER fault and I should not be charged. I threatened to come in with or without an appt and MAKE her see me. You can't fuck w/ infections in the mouth. Iv'e had alot of dental work and complications to know that it spreads to the brain very easilly. So 4 days later she sees me. Admits her mistake and gives me amoxicillan...which I forgot to take 3x today. oops! Not use to any medicine regimen.

My dad called me about shop rite's Can Can Sale..........AGAIN! I get this call every year. My dad used to work for the company that owns Shop Rite and he's OBSESSED with Shop Rite (a grocery store in NJ) I think my dad misses working and if it weren't for his heart condition, he'd still BE working. Every year they have a Can Can Sale and its discounted canned food. I think now its other shit besides cans. But in the 80s it was almost all cans. I don't EAT canned food *dons princess crown* but I would get the other non can shit on sale. As a matter of fact, I went to Shop Rite yesterday to fill the Amoxicillan Rx cuz its free there and got ALOT of shit on sale while I was there. I think the Can Can is theonly time I'll shop at Shop Rite. Their meat is too expensive. I'm a big meat eater so...... yeah.

Been doing some work in the ice rink lately, getting my legs n' thighs back into the swing of things. I haven't gone in 8mo and boy does it make a difference. I really wanna jump but I shouldn't w/ no insurance =( but..... hehehe. I was always good w/ jumps and.......yeah. I think we know what happens next. TOE LOOP!!! lol. Not the best spinner. I have to practice those a lil' more.

I lost 9 lbs, but then gained 4 back in 10hrs yesterday. I didn't eat much at all so I'm not sure why i gained 4b ack but I probably am not taking in enough calories. So I decided to eat MORE! Losing weight is so hard. I'm gonna KILL the person who's actions caused me to gain all this weight. UGH! I refuse to be fat forever. Its been 2yrs of fathood already. 2yrs is enough. I want my athletic body back! I sitll have it. Muscles n' all..............under the fat. But noone knows it but me *sings*.

I was gonna write more but my gum hurts. Fucking dentist! I am not a painkiller girl, so I refuse to take anything for the pain. The icecream I ate helped but its worn off. Usually I drink water all day to soothe the pain but its getting close to bedtime and I dont wanna have to get up in the middle of the night to pee so I have to curtail the water intake for now.

Time to go. Jersey Shore is on in 45 min and its a double episode. Plus theres shit on at 11 I wanna see. I don't know if I'll stay up that late (I tiyad) but I'll try.

Gay Marriage Rally - Trenton Jan 4,2009

Normally, I spend my time working mindless, menial, temp jobs since I still have not found a full time, respectable job in this economy, OR I sit at home watching Rachael Ray, Tyra, random documentaries on the History Channel, Design shows on HGTV (which we no longer get cuz Cablevision doesn't carry them anymore *fumes*, but that, myfriends is another blog), and walk a few miles on the cold windy boardwalk. Fun ain't it? My friend suggested I come to this rally to support gay marriage. Why not? I believe in the cause. I hate the government. Sounds like a plan!

My view on gay marriage is as follows:

For those who say marriage's purpose is to produce children, I say, lots of people don't want to have children or can't have children. So if gay marriage is illegal, then I guess those people who can't or wont reproduce shouldn't marry either. Not even 'shouldn't' , they should be banned. That arguement goes out the window. Yes its true only a man and woman can naturally create a child, but we're not talking about that. We're talking about the act of marriage itself. Gay couples are living together, adopting, they're generally (in my experience but I lived in NYC for much of my adult life) accepted by society now, compared to years before. Why not make it legal? Why not allow benefits for a GUY and his HUSBAND? The benefits don't state that the spouse HAS to be of the opposite sex. But hopefully they wont' change that. This is 2010 people! we dont' live in George Washington's time, and we're not all bible toting holy rollers either! And there WERE priests, pastors, reverends and rabbis IN SUPPORT of gay marriage, and some of them were straight. How is it gonna affect YOU personally if Jane and Stacy get married, or Tom and Bill? How will YOUR life change? It won't. You can think its not "God's way" That's fine. I'm not one to force my beliefs on other people. But you can't PREVENT people from doing things (that don't affect you) just because YOU don't like it. I don't like when people sleep around, have 4 kids by 4 baby daddies, get on welfare that my taxes pay for, and I can't get gov't assistance when I lose my job and need help. But am I gonna make it illegal for people to have kids out of wedlock? lol NO. Cuz that's a small minority. Most of the ppl who have kids out of wedlock DON'T affect me and take very good care of their kids. Back to gay marriage tho'.... The government has no right to tell people how to live their lives. They make laws to better this state/country (or they are supposed to anyway...) but telling Mike and Scott they can't marry cuz they're two men is not their business. Not every religious head has to marry those couples. There will be plenty of people who WILL marry them. If you are a good Christian (most of them aren't anyway cuz they're hipocrites who preach and then sin in another way lol), and you really ARE following your faith, live your good Christian life and believe what you believe, and let these people be happy and have the same oppt'ies you have. If you're just closed minded, same to you. Let them be happy. You don't have to agree. But don't block a civil right just cuz you don't like it. I don't like when people marry for money or convenience either. But do I think it should be blocked? No. Its not my PROBLEM! Gay marriage when its approved, cuz I know it will be, will probably far surpass our own marriage success rate of 40%. Just watch.

No, I'm not gay, but I have met lots of gay people in my life and they deserve the same rights as anyone else. We're supposed to move forward in the present, not move backwards.

The hardest part was getting up at 5:30am. Well, so I thought. Actually Sunday never ended for me, since when I tried to go to bed at midnight, it just didn't happen. I tossed, I turned, I thought, and thought and thought. I always think about my future and what I can do to prevent it from going into total ruin. Needless to say I didn't sleep at all. Not a wink. It was a long, frustrating night. So getting up at 5:30 am wasn't so bad since I didn't actually get "up". I merely got out of BED. My body was tired, definitely but what can I do? I didn't want to back out and spend another day HERE. So I got in the shower, washed my hair, put on layers of clothes and went to Trenton. Luckally my friend was driving. She slept 2hrs versus my zero so.... Yeah. Got Dunkin Donuts and were off. I never have been to Trenton before either and I've lived in NJ for all but 7 years of my life. It wasn't all that actually. *shrug*

We got to the Capitol area, got lost, walked in the freezing cold and found the rest of the people. We got free tshirts, donuts and coffee (though I passed on the donuts and coffee). We went inside to watch an assembly take place, but the gay marrage bill wasn't on their agenda. But I heard everyone else's stories (most of them were gay and lesbian) about them wanting to get married and needing the health benfits (don't we all!). I had trouble staying awake during the assembly. It was on tv too. Ugh! I hope they didn't show me!After that we got a note saying there was pizza across the street! Yay carbs! Yay energy! Yay soda! I went to pee and my friend came out and then when we got outside, they directed us to another building for a press conference (outside. we were told we wouldn't be outside). Wha....? What about the pizza?! I saw people across the street stuffing the pizza in their mouths and guzzling pepsis before running over. DAMMIT!!!

The press conf was long, cold, but for a good cause. Alot of people spoke. The head of it was a gay jew with an equality yamaka, and a female jew cantor also wearing a sparkly yamaka (i didn't know the girls wore them). There were clergy people, Catholic priests, southern reverends, pastors, and a black preacher (woooohooo!). He made a good point saying that in the 60s and before, blacks and whites couldn't marry because the govt said THAT wasn't a marriage. Gay and lesbian couples spoke and told their stories while the cameras rolled.

Then, we marched back to the Senate/Capitol thingy and had to stand in the hallway to catch senators and congressmen and assembly people as they went to their meetings. I wasn't gonna talk to any of them. I had nothing to say that was any different. The other people did. A group of lesbians desended on a senator and got in his face and showed him alls orts of documents (I couldn't see what htey were) and were really giving it to him. He responded by rudely saying "I gotta go!" and ran away. Lots of the workers were for gay marriage tho', and wore pins stating so.

I was getting hungry and needed carbs or caffeine or something. I went to the cafe and got a balsamic chicken wrap and a soda. The cafe was way underground through a labrynth of basement hallways. On the way back up, I got in the elevator and our Governor himself, Jon Corzine came into the car. He was joking with a female staffer because she had a dollar sticking out of her purse and he said don't leave this here for him to take. She responded with "hahahaha oh Governor, you're SOOO funny *forced laugh*" Really, lady, why not ask him to bend over so you can plant a big smoocharoo on his ASS. *roll eyes* I came back to find out we were going back outside. We did, then went into the senate building, then back to the capitol, then out to a fountain for a send off by the Garden State Equality People.

I was glad I went. It was a good experience. I really hope they pass this bill for their sake. I really want them to be able to marry too and I'm really disappointed and disgusted by the government the way they treat people and try to run their lives. The government is supposed to make laws and maintain order. That's it. On the way out, we saw some protesters in front of the building where our rally was held. They were none other than....

HASIDIC JEWS!!!!! Lmao!!! They turn up in the damndest places, don't they? They shun our world, think everyone is dirty, and unkosher,or whatever, then they come here to lobby against gay marriage. I read that hasidic jewish marriages aren't recognized by the state either so... you'd think they'd know how that feels. Again, if thats against their religion, fine. Any gay members can just LEAVE the community and make a new life. You'll never change the holy rollers be they Christian, Catholic or Jewish, so let them be. They shouldn't get involved in something that doesn't concern them at all.

The Jews protesting. The Star Ledger said they were Rabbis from Lakewood and Borough Park Brooklyn. Why am I not surprised?

Me and my friend in the senate building. Probably never gonna get to go in there again!

We drove the long drive home, went to the unemployment office (not for me this time), and I got home. My apt was FREEZING (its usually really hot but I dont' know what happened). I watched Tyra (yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and the news and my usual reality trash. It was a good day. I was happy I participated in this, and I will continue to support it for my gay friends' rights.

FIN. <---lol

Frank The Entertainer: A Basement Affair

So the idiot from I love New York, and I Love Money has his own show. I was wondering how they were gonna pull this one off, bringing skanks into a basement. I assumed they'd put them into a mansion. In the opener, Frank says that they're NOT gonna give him a mansion like Flavor Flav or Bret Michaels, but he has to use his "real home" in Queens.

Real home, my ass! Their "house" is much bigger and much more fancy than the other houses on the block. IF it were a real house, it looks like it was built on 2 lots instead of one. They'd also have to be pretty rich. Franks Italian parents don't strike me as being rich at all. The house just doesn't belong on that street. Its either digitally added, or there's a facade on the housefront (or two of them made to look like one), and is only used for filming them entering or exiting the house. Inside is obvisouly a sound stage, or a bigger house like on I love Money.

When the skanks.....errr....girls arrived, typical little hoochies, they were brought into a livijng room which was very spacious and obviously created and decorated to LOOK like a typical middle class Queens Italian family home, but was not. Noone's home is THAT spacious, I'm sorry, unless you're the Kardashians but we KNOW they have money!

None of the skanks, errrr girls are really that pretty except a few guidettes, and the blonde chinese girl. Oh and the black girl w/ the long weave. The other black girl that looks like Eve with a Saleisha cut (from America's Next Top Model) doesn't know who Frank is and he called her out on it. The rest are typical dumb bimbos, and that Annie chick (the hippy w/ the flowered stretch pants on is either an idiot, or an actress hired to be the comic relief.) We already know theres a house bitch and a house whore. Lets see what other titles can be assigned!

I can't stand the entertainer. I was never a fan. But his mother is funny. This show is ridic ridic RIDIC!!!!

Will I watch?


You bet'cho ASS! =D


Since when do I NOT watch ridiculous reality shows? Jersey Shore what, WHAT?!

Oh and Celebrity Rehab w/ Dr. Drew starts on Thurs! Kari Ann Peniche's in that too. She's the only reason I watched Sex Rehab. You never know what she's gonna do next. So glad all my shows are back! I am watching the Jackson 5 show too. I love that show. All the brothers are so likeable. I just wanna like.......hang out with them! Anyway, I'll try to write some reviews of other shows as time permits. I'm gonna be temping full time and going to school full time soon. The temp job is only for Jan though. Then back to the job search once again.

Today I gotta go to bed early since I'm going to some Gay Marriage Equality Rally thingy in Trenton. I'm pretty excited cuz I never did one of those before. Never been to my own state's capital. And Its for a cause I believe in. I DO think gay people should be allowed to marry. Why the hell not? Are they committing a crime in doing so? NO! So why should the gov't outlaw it? Boggles the mind,b ut we all know I have issues w/ the government anyway. Speaking of which, my license is expired and driving around here which is swimming w/ cops is difficult. Tuesday I'm gonna head to the DMV to get my new license. I guess I have to get all made up to look "natural' lmao. Sad that you need so much makeup for the natural look. Otherwise you look washed out as most ppl do in their drivers license photo. Mostly just lining the eyes and putting color on your lips and defining eyebrows is enough. I dont' do crazy colors. haha. My hair is darkish so I guess it'll have to do. Who knows what my color will be. I heard the new licenses are supa high tech. I have a new license I got in 2005. I dont know if they were made better recently. I bet theres some kinda tracking chip in them. I dont want ppl to track me!!!! The gov't goes too far sometimes *stomps foot*! Too far. I have no idea what the new license has. Alli know is the under 21 crowd gets a license thats vertical vs our horizontal one. Everyone at school has em. I thought that was new for this state but was told it was just the younguns.

Anyway, I'll try to post about the Gay Marriage Rally thing too. G'noche!

Why I wish Christmas would come and go quickly

People who don't know me probalby don't know why I "hate" Christmas, or really any holiday. I didn't always. I used to love Christmas. It was my fave holiday. I loved decorating the tree, smeling the tree smell, putting up the ornaments, listening to Christmas music, watching Christmas movies on tv, goint to someone's house on Christmas eve (or having them come to our house) since I'm social and all, and most of all, the anticipation of Christmas day to see what presents we got. Now thats the pagan Christmas, not the Birth of Christ Christmas, which I never celebrated since all of my immediate family are non-religous. So paganism it is!

My parents divorced in 1991 and that was our last Christmas. After that, my father vanished from our lives to go shack up w/ several gold digging whores, and my mother remarried a guy who hated us and locked us away. Christmas didn't exist anymore. It just stopped like a car that hit the anti lock brakes. I spent my 2 Christmases in my stepfather's house locked in my room, out of sight, out of mind. No tree, no presents. No ornaments. No xmas songs. No house hopping on xmas eve. No nothing.

I escaped Tennesee (where my mother moved us to with her new husband who fond work at the GM plant down there) in 1994 to move back in with my father who obviously didn't want me but....tough! You create me, you DEAL with me!!! 1995 was my first Christmas back in NJ. It was an attempt. We had a tree, we had lights, and I got a few presents. I think I got a donut, a Mariah Carey CD, new rollerblades, a few sweaters, and did I mention a donut? But the presents don't make Christmas. There was something missing. That Christmas I sat in my townhouse alone watching "Miracle on 34th Street" like 3 times in a row, bored out of my mind. My father iddn't food shop. I had no food to eat, and no stores were open. Back then nothing was open on Xmas. Its changed now thank god. Usually chinese is open! I went for a walk thru our development and looked in windows of the other families eating together, having fun etc. I realized Christmas as I knew it was over. I knew it was over til I become part of another family. Basically when I get married, assuming my hubby has a good relationship with his fam.

What little family I have, I don't fit in to. My aunt and uncle (dad's bro and his wife) are hardcore bible toting, holy rolling Catholics who shove it down my throat, and make no secret that I am not accepted or welcome in to their fam since I was never baptised Catholic, refused to BE baptized, and said that religion is a fantasy story used to explain how we got here cuz noone was smart enough to figure it out back in the olden days. Wellt hats what i think! Sue me! My uncle calls me a fuck up, and says I'm no good (aside from lack of Catholicism) and I am a disappointment cuz I didn't get good grades, go to college, join hte millitary and get married. So needless to say I'm not wanted or accepted in that group. I have another uncle (dads younger bro) who is so ghetto, that he brought weed to Great Adventure and rolled joints while his sons were on the go karts. He goes thru garbage cans and is just so unbelieveably ghetto, he's embarassing. I dont' fit in w/ them. Frankly, they dont fit in with the bible toters either but they're more welcome than me since they are CATHOLIC and listen to my aunt preach about the topic du jour.

I have cousins. Lots of em. THey're not bible toters but since they are with the bible toter clan on holidays I can't hang w/ them. My dad sits home alone. Perfectly content that way. My mother and I are estranged and she wants me to visit but i dont want to. So what options does that leave me on a holiday? Nothing really. Sit home in front of the tv. I used to aimlessly roam the streets of East Brunswick, the town I lived in from 1994 to 2000 every year, every single holiday. I couldn't hang w/ friends since they were all with their families.

On a normal day, yes you're alone. You work, come home, make dinner, shower, watch tv and go to bed. No biggie. But on holidays everyone kind of goes to where they belong. They go to be with others like them. They're accepted and welcome and supported and whatever else. I don't belong anywhere. I don't belong with my bible toting aunt and uncle who put me down and think I'm a fuck up. I don't belong w/ my estranged mother who allowed her husband to lock me up and starve me, and I don't belong with my ghetto cousins and uncle from the bronx who roll joints in a public place and mooch off of me cuz they think I'm "rich". So where do I belong?

I don't.

Christmas kind of rubs it in that you have noone in this world who gives a flying fuck about you. I mean I know every day of my life that this is true, but for some reason holidays are harder. I really thought that by my age I would have been married and adopted into another family and have my own. That hasn't happened so every Christmas gets harder and harder. I miss Christmas alot. I really can't wait to have it again but I know its not possible til I get married. I dont want people to invite me over out of pity, cuz i dont belong there. I used to go somewhere for thanksgiving a few years but clearly I did not belong. I felt like a complete outsider. I guess I just have to wait it out. I learned in psychology that human beings have a need to belong.

That need in me has not been realized. That's why I hate holidays. Maybe now you'll understand a little better when I get into these moods. I'm bored, have nowhere to go where I'm welcome and accepted, and I get to hear about, see pics from and listen to everyones happy stories of something that I lost half a lifetime ago.