This Is It Review

This isn't a spoiler, so anyone who hasn't seen the movie could read this if they want to. I'll be as vague as I can.....for now!

I was so excited to see this movie and it was soooo worth the wait. I dressed up in my fedora, all black, and a jeweled glove. I gave my friend the other glove and I saw a few other people dressed up MJ-like. They were all cheering and saying we're gonna love it.

It was so cool seeing the backstage-ness during the tour. You got to see MJ mess up, make excuses for WHY he messed up, his "duh" moments, interviews w/ people who worked on the production, MJ in his pjs rehearsing, and the movies that were gonna be played with the songs when the show would've been performed. The movie was so funny! I've heard Michael was pretty funny offstage, and this movie shows it.

The people in our theatre danced, sang, cheered, yelled out "Go'on Michael!", clapped etc. I like an interactive crowd! It was sooo fun! I wish I could freakin 'see it again! I will be first in line to buy it! I hope the DVD has more footage on it. It was 2hrs but I wanted more, damnit!

My fave part was when the Smooth Criminal rehearsal was on, and MJ was supposed to do something on cue. He missed it. Kenny Ortega the director was like "Are we misunderstanding something? That was the cue" MJ said "I wanna cue it!" Kenny then asked, "Michael, how are you gonna see when the screen behind you changes from (something) to (the other thing)?" Michael, serious, pauses for a minute and says "I can feel it...I'll feel it." Never cracking a smile. LMAO Thats all I'll say. So much else to talk about! Must contain self!

It was also sad in a way. Seeing this movie reminded me why I love MJ so much. I grew up w/ his music, as we all did. Seeing his personality, since he never talks much during concerts. Its sad to know that this person is no longer with us and we'll never get to see this again =(. I am so grateful I got to see him in concert. It was the most high energy, fun concert I have ever been to. I went with my friend Christina, and I bought tix off eBay for 200 dolla. I met a stranger on a NY streetcorner near my job, hoping the tix were real. They were thank god! I rememember fake Michaels walking around Madison SqGarden and how insane the fans acted cuz they looked alot like the real Michael! I remember the Jackson 5, the Billie Jean dance, jumping and singing and dancing and having the best time ever! I will never forget that moment when I was 21yrs old. My first, last and ONLY time seeing Michael Jackson in concert. In the movie I saw glimpses of the OLD MJ. He looks pretty good there actually. I used to have a huge crush on MJ in 1987 in the BAD years. I still saw a lil' of that him tonight. He moved really good and sang really good for 50yrs old. I could only imagine what he could have done, had Dr Murray not injected him with tons of SHIT that night =(

RIP Michael.... its just not sinking in that you're gone.

The Lark is ASCENDING!!!!

I always wished that I was able to play the violin. My great aunt played violin with the New York Philharmonic back in the 60s and 70s I think. Maybe it was earlier. Anyway, when it was time to pick instruments in 4th grade, my school, in Jackson NJ, only had wind band available. It wasn't until I was in high school in a different school district, East Brunswick, that I realized some schools had orchestras. I think hands down, I would've picked violin. There are millions of violin players, though. And your chances of getting into a symphony are so rare. But shit, it ain't like I'm getting into a symphony on flute! I'm a bad sight reader. Nothing changes that. I can play something perfectly that is considered difficult, but I still will bomb sight reading. I just don't have THAT talent. I have a shitty attention span lately. I was told it was cuz of stress. What ISN'T cuz of stress nowadays??? I try to avoid situations where I have to sight read.


So anyway, last spring at a NJ Symphony Orchestra concert, there was a violin soloist who played a piece called "Lark Ascending". It was performed by a chinese girl. The song sounds very chinese. Surprisingly, its composer is NOT chinese, but british or american...not sure. I remember this piece because I really liked it #1, and #2 it's a popular song for figure skaters to skate to. I still watch figure skating competitions on tv, if I know they're on! I recently saw a program by Yu-na Kim (current 2009 World Champion, and my fave skater at the present time), where she skates to this song. I decided to try my luck to find it free online. Some sheet music is out there, if you have patience (I don't lol) and look for hours. I wasn't able to find it, but I did find this sample on a sheet music ordering site. It shows the first page only. Its such a pretty song. Here is a youtube of the song. It's long, but you can follow along w/ the first page if you read music. Hint: Its a long cadenza which means its not really following the music exactly. Its left open to interpretation. If you don't know what I mean, you probably aren't a musician or a singer, so just listen to it instead! =)






I'm debating on buying this piece. Its for violin, and I play flute. They both are concert pitch, meaning they are both in the same key. For those non music people... not all instruments play the same notes. Clarinets, Saxophones, Cellos and Violas for example play in different 'keys', or notes. A Flute's "D" would be an "E" on a clarinet or trumpet. I'm not sure about the other instruments. But I know they're not concert pitched. Sooo flutes can play violin music with an orchestra. This probalby wouldn't happen in real life just cuz you can find so many violin PLAYERS but it wouldn't be off key if a flute played a violin part. I remember in school I was in the symphony orchestra and we had to play with the violins sometimes just so we wouldn't have a million measures rest waiting to come in. I have some violin music in my music binder. One of my faves is "Meditation" by Massanet. That's another story though.

So yeah, I'm not sure if I'm gonna buy this piece. It's very long. It seems a lil' repetative. I'll have to listen to it again to see. If I decide not to buy it, I at least have the first page to use as a warm up or something. LOL!

2010 Olympic Disappointment

Next year the Olympics are gonna be on our continent! They'll be in Vancouver! I know this, and yet my dumb ass and last minuteness has fucked me yet again. I was just looking at the ticketing site for the Olympics and the events I want to see are SOLD the fuck out! I can't say I blame anyone but myself. I should have gotten on this last year! Going to the Olympics is far from cheap and I'd really need a good paying job to do this. I don't have that still, although I thought I would by now. Soooo short of a miracle, I will not be attending the 2010 Olympic Games. But I want to make it a POINT to attend the 2014 games, wherever they may be. I'm pretty sure I'll be a working Nurse or worst case, working in Finance or Pharma again if all else fails. I'll also be 34 years old during those games, and vow to do it before I die! Well, as long as the world doesn't end in 2012 like they say it will. Otherewise, I'm gonna die at 32 =(.

In 2013 I will have to pool together some money (hopefully a friend or two or three would want to join me) and purchase a package to see multiple events and the opening ceremonies if possible. I always like to see the figure skating events. Maybe a hockey game or 2. Dunno. But figure skating first and foremost. I'd like to watch all skating events. There are alot though. 2 Mens, 2 Womens, 4 Ice Dance, 2 pairs, and 1 exhibition of winners. But if I'm making good money it'd be worth it.

Seeing the Olympics is a once in a lifetime thing (unless you're rich, which I clearly am not). I will attend the games at least once. The summer Olympics are cool too. I'd only really be in to Gymnastics cuz I was a lil gymnast for a few years but stuck w/ skating for the longest.

I am considering going to a skating event in Lake Placid NY this winter. I want to see my fave skater (now), Yu Na Kim.

I don't know how long the drive is to Lake Placid, but I really wanna enjoy my life to the fullest now. I have this inkling time is very limited. My motto is ''live like you're gonna die tomorrow''. I try to. Money usually holds me back. Somtehing held in NY is much easier to coordinate, than going to Vancouver. Also the flight to vancouver is ridic. No direct flights! Was not thrilled about that. I wonder who the contenders are for the 2014 Games. I know Rio just won the 2012 Games (Summer). Only the winter games really matter to me. I can' watch the summer games on tv. I only watch gymnastics, and diving.

I'm adding another mission to my many missions at present: Heather 2014!! Anyone who's remotely interested in a trip (I'm sure we'll all have jobs by then!) Holla and make your interest known!

Birthday Moon

The moon on my birthday was a WAXING GIBBOUS. I checked several sites and they all said this, so I assume it's accurate. I think the moon is pretty fascinating. Its interesting how the tides are affected by the full and new moon. Now that I have a kayak, I'm always watching the tides, and I know that if there's NOT a hurricane out in the ocean somewhere (ahem), low tide during full or new moon produces very shallow shorlines and usually calm (again if theres no hurricane).

Next year on my 30th bday, the moon will also be a waxing gibbous but fuller than the pic above. Every ten years the moon will be halfway into the next stage as ten years before.

This is what the moon looks like now. It's lit from the bottom. Acutally not as much as the pic. Its still got a bit of a tilt to it. I read that the 12th planet (I have no idea what that is!) is pushing the Earth UP above its eliptical plain. The earth rotates around the sun at the same angle (usually), but when this happens, the Earth moves up. So the sun is now BELOW us, as opposed to on the other side of the earth on the same plain. I never really noticed that the moon seems to tilt before. So the moon never moves, its just the sun that does. So the Earth's shadow blocks part of the moon on a tilt, making it look like the moon has tilted.

This is what I was up doing last night. Ya know, since I hardly sleep anymore.

I also did my moon chart. I don't know what all this shit means tho'. But maybe tonight when I can't sleep, I'll read more on this. My sun sign is Cancer (or Gemini, not noted on here but I usually just SAY I'm a Gemini). My moon sign is Libra. My ruling planet is Venus.

I wish I had more to add. But I really don't! Ive been sitting home all day going crazy out of sheer boredom. I really hate that my life has become this way. If I get into the other Nursing prog, I'll be in school everyday (in place of work) so I should be ya know, occupied. But I still worry about will my UE extend long enough to finish! *bites fingernails*. But If I don't do this and take the risk, will I EVER find a regular job? No prospects at all right now. At least the nursing thing will get me a guaranteed job in May of 2011. If I do nothing, I could just be temping and collecting til then and beyond. No guarantees. I think the choice is obvious. I'm just worried. I won't get a job IN TIME. *sigh*. This had nothing to do w/ moons. I just wanted to vent cuz thats what's [almost always] on my mind these days.

Back on the moon topic, I wish I had a telescope. I had planned to get one. I live near the beach and if you sit on the shoreline at night, the lights don't obstruct the view and I could prob get a really good view of space. Iv'e never seen a planet other than it looking like a star (saw Jupiter and Mercury last winter) But they are just star like with the naked eye. But VERY bright in daylight. It was pretty cool. I hate that my interests are always in things that get me nowhere in life. lol. Oh well. Time to go search for more shit to keep myself occupied til rehearsal tonight.

ER Costs Uncorked!

Uncorked was my own thing. Instead of uncovered. I'm staring at a bottle of wine that I have on my shelf (for decoration). Different spin on things... If you think the ER visit is only $800 like I did (lol @ only), think again! I went to the hospital finance office to apply for charity care, when the woman broke down my whole bill. I was SHOCKED at the true costs of an ER visit. Read on...

I have been having strange stomach pains for weeks. It mimicked ya know....female cramps, but i never get those! So I knew something was really weird. At first, I dismissed it thinking maybe this once I am getting cramps. But as time went on the cramping felt worse, like a pinching pain. Like something inside me was being pinched really hard.

Since I'm still unemployed and poor, I had to go to the poor people clinic in Long Branch. I was the only non mexican person there, as usual. I get stared at like "why are YOU here" by the mexican women with their 6 kids running rampantly around the waiting room, and its not a fun place to go to because of the hour plus waits (even with an appointment). When I finally saw the Dr (who looked like a high school student), she didn't know what was wrong w/ me. What a suprise! She didnt have the handy dandy diagnosing computer that the LAST ER doc used to diagnose me last summer w/ a skin infection. Shit, Can I be a Doctor too? Anyway, the Dr sent me to the hospital for an ultrasound. I dont know why she couldnt send me to the poor people obgyn clinic for this (would've only cost me $20). They claim its booked up til Dec. Well wouldn't this be an emerg? No. Pregant mexican women (probably on their 7th or 8th kid by now) are the priority there. Although those are my words, not hers. lol.

My appt was 3 wks into the future. Before I started college (YES i know I'm old. I'm going back for nursing), the abominal pain got worse to a stabbing kind of pain. I decided to go to the ER because if it was something serious, i had time to drop my classes and maybe do online classes. I had to know before school started. My appt was well after the add/drop deadline. I went and they were of couse thrilled by my insurancelessness, and was told to wait. Surprisingly, I was taken in right away. I got a room with a bed instantly and I saw the $$$s start adding up. I did not want to rack up TOO much more medical debt from this but know its kinda inevitable. I was trying to be a frugalista about it. In the end, I found out what was wrong w/ me. Something that should cure itself. It hasnt at press time though. When I went in to apply for Charity Care yesterday with all my documents, the financial svcs girl told me that my bill was not $1900 like I was told (thru bills sent to my house..and they were sent QUICK!!!), but $8000. Yes you read that right. $8000.

I went to the ER at a different hospital last year. My bill was $800 and change. Yes thats 2 zeros. Eight Hundred. So how is this one Eight THOUSAND?! Well here goes...

Just to walk in the ER at this hospital costs $1076. (wtf?!) Had I known, I wouldve gone to a ghetto hospital. Maybe it'd be cheaper.

Having the bed and the room cost $ although I don't remember all the costs.

Getting blood drawn costs money. I had a cholesterol/sugar/liver functions/thyroid/gastrointestinal functions check. That cost $1200 and change.

Now, I didn't NEED a cholesterol/sugar/thyroid check. I know its routine but on someone w/ no ins who just GOT these tests done for school a month bfore (and this hospital can SEE the results cuz i had it done there) I didnt need em AGAIN! Is anything really gonna change. Just test the stomach stuff then!!!

Then theres the PEE. I pee for free everyday! Well that day it cost heavily to pee. Dont take peeing for granted, now!!!! Everyone who enters the ER must pee!!! Unless you physically can't I guess. Your pee gets tested for kidney issues, and pregnancy. The kidney portion of the pee test was $1087!!!




Then theres the routine pregnancy test. That cost $200 something dollars. I could've bought a First Response for that rate, OR if you're gonna give me an ultrasound ANYWAY, I'm pretty sure you'd see a baby if I was pregnant.

Later on I got an IV. I didn't want the IV. One thing we learned in our first nursing class was that a patient has a right to refuse any treatment. I planned to EXERCISE that right! I told the nurse I do not want the IV. I didn't know it cost what it cost. But I didn't need it. I was not dehydrated, and I had a huge bottle of water WITH me in the room cuz I didn't know how long I'd be in the hospital. She says everyone gets an IV. Great! Another needle in my vein, swollen fingers on that hand, and a nuisence of wheeling the pole w/ me wherever I go. >=/.

The IV by the way, cost over $1000.

That shocked me! I was livid! I told the lady "I didn't even WANT the IV!!!!" The lady (finance lady) agreed w/ my views and said the prices are beyond ridic. But wait! Theres's more!

I had 3 different ultrasounds. They were all $1200 EACH!!! I thought they were $350ish as per a friend on facebook. Well not at the ER they aint'! The finance lady said if I got them at regular radiology, it would've been a few hundred for each. Goddamnit!

Oh yes... I even got charged for my shitty, cold, turkey sandwich that I requested cuz I was there all day and starving and was told I had to fast before the ultrasound. That was $87. Shit, if you charge me $87 for my dinner, it better be at fucking Jean George in NYC for a 4 course meal, fine wine and decadant dessert! *roll eyes*.

There were other small costs for stupid things and it all added up to $8000. So then they reduced the bill down to $800 and change cuz I'm uninsured. The bills I got said double that though. They said if I do charity care, I pay 20% off the original $8000 cost which would be $1700ish. If I did self pay with no charity care, it'd be left as the $800. But then again if I need to go for anyting else, since I said my issue hasn't gone away, I would need charity care cuz otherwise theyw ant a partial deposit....which after this month's school refund is gone, I wont' have. I decided to leave this instance as a self pay. If I have to get an MRI or CAT scan later I will wait to go to the regular Radiology dept and have THEM do it for cheaper, then try for charity care for them. As long as the rules dont change. I pay 20% based on my unemployment. If I made $200/mo less, I'd be 100% covered. I wish there was a way to bullshit that. There is but its too late. I have no idea what I have to do next but all I know is my debt is steadily climbing due to medical expenses, and that shitty temp insurance I had denying every claim I had basically this past summer.

Next time you or I go to the ER and you're uninsured... remember how much the pee and the IV cost. I know it'll make a huge difference for me. I will refuse alot of things now that I know how much they cost. Cuz the reduced bill I got of $800 might have been even LOWER.

And why will the hospitals reduce the costs down from $8000 to $800 without hesitating? Because most major INSURANCE companies will only pay a MAX of $800 and change. If a person is insured, they'll take the max, and case closed. No add'l money owed. If you are unemployed and uninsured, you can't possibly pay $8000, so they reduce it down to what they would've gotten from the ins company had you had insurance coverage. They would however still take your $8000 if you had it. Crooks!!!! Something to think about there.