So alot of you know that I decided to go back to school for nursing because A) I couldn't find a job in finance, marketing, pharma, or really ANYTHING, and B) it is an interesting field with lots of medical knowledge, and they're respected and shit, I'm a hypochondriac! So what better than to become a nurse. Although after taking the class, I must say that I'm a little more paranoid because I know MORE medical stuff than before. But that's another topic. Here's the story of my nursing class...
I was apprehensive about going back to school given my age. I know I look like I'm 23. Albeit a chubby 23yr old, but inside, is the brain of a 29 year old. The night before the class I had one of my friends over from the weekend. We had gone to Great Adventure, and then bullshit around Ocean Grove by the beach for a while. I had hoped to go to bed early. Didn't happen. I was awake all nite wondering what it would be like. Hoping I wouldn't be the oldest one in the class. Hoping they wouldn't make us work in groups. I hate group work! Hoping we didnt have to role play like in the American Management Association classes in NYC I had to take. I've been out of school for a long time so I'm a lil' rusty with thinking in non-corporate formats.
I watched the clock pretty much from 5am on. Then got up at 7, jumped over Kelly, who sleeps on an air mattress in my living room, threw some clothes on, popped in my contacts, brushed my teef, and ran outta there. I stopped at Dunkin Donuts on the way, realizing that my funds were dwindling down to the single digits now, but needed to be AWAKE for class. I didn't know what I needed to do and food DOES help with concentration. Which I do have a problem with. Especially during times of stress, which.....is like everyday when you're unemployed.
I get there 2 min before 8:30 as usual (I'm neva early!), and the only seat is in the front. Great. I look at the class and I see alot of young faces. Young like 18-20yr olds. Granted they may be older cuz I myself am constantly being told I look 23-25ish. But once I heard the girls talk, I realized they MUST be young because they were immature as HELL. I felt like I was in a high school classroom. Then a few older people walked in. Thank god. I didn't know where I stood as far as age. Was I the oldest? At least there were a few who I believed to be in their late 20s early 30s.
The first day wasn't so bad. It was pretty quick. Learned alot of stuff, intro'd the class, and stuff like that.
The second day, we were in a different room. I got there a little earlier that day so I sat in the BACK of the class. I noticed when I pulled up that the parking lot was filled with luxury cars. Benzes, BMWs, Audis, Lexuses, Infinitis, Acuras, etc. My car was always regarded as a 'nice car', altho' its not a luxury car by any means. But my car looked like a lil' pauper in the lot of shiny sparkly rich people cars.
Upon sitting in my seat in the back, I looked at the other people and saw that almost everyone had designer bags. Now don't get me wrong, I had designer bags when I was 20yrs old too! So I'm not gonna judge since I had them too, but I did have a full time job and bought them myself! I don't know these back stories, but something tells me if you are 20, and you have a Mercedes (that you presumeably bought) you probably wouldn't have money left over to buy designer bags. How much can you possibly make at 20? Its safe to assume that daddy furnished his lil' princess with a Benz, and Burberry tote bag. They also all had iPhones, voyagers, or Blackberrys. I don't know why I was annoyed by this, cuz I also have what these chicks had (minus luxury car. I never made enough $ to buy one, but if I didn't have rent I could! =D lol) Anyway in this class we learned how to take pulses and stuff. I started noticing the princessy nature of alot of these girls. Alot of em just put their fingers lightly on other people's wrists and were like " ugh, I can't DO this!!!"
Whenever we had lunch break (a measly 30 minutes - where everything was like 15 min away from the campus), I felt ashamed to get into my Toyota Corolla while these chicks got into their shiny luxe cars. There were a few average cars. An SUV, a nissan something or other, and some kinda white car. Everything else though was luxury. I usually went to McDonalds but by the 2nd or 3rd day, I was almost out out of money. So I bought a box of Granola bars due to their protein content. Helps with concentration. Trust me, I need ALL the help i can get in that area! I'm a horrible concentrator. I sometimes think I have ADD, but was told I don't. I was told its stress changing my brain pysiology and to fix the stressful problems in my life. Ha! Find me a good paying job, and that eliminates alot right there. since that hasn't happened, making sure I eat lots of protein is ESSENTIAL, esp in school.
So my breakfast was a granola bar the rest of classes, and my lunch usually was too. I was still fucking starving, since the granolas are only 110 calories. I'm sure I lost a lil'weight during that time. But come paycheck time, I usually splurge =/.
Second week of the Nursing class was patient transfers. For this we had to pick a partner and practice rolling them over, and changing the diaper. Yes we had to wear the diapers, over our clothes. Most of the girls, aside from being rich, were TINY. Like size 0 tiny. A few were bigger. I wasn't the fattest one in the class but I'd say 90% of these girls were skinny bitches. They were easy to roll over and transfer. I really hoped they wouldn't use me as a dummy to roll. The nurse who taught the class was like "most of the female patients are heavy. so you guys have it easy here!" I was worried she'd get me or one of the other non size zeros to be the 'heavy patient', although i'm sure there are patients MUCH bigger than me. I am pretty heavy but noone knows that. I mean if I do tell my weight to someone they're pretty shocked. No doubt I've gained alot but the number itself will shock you. I guess cuz I'm tall. So maybe I would be the heavy patient but not the fattest cuz alot of the old ladys are short, and weigh what i weigh. Making them techinically more overweight than me. LUCKALLY she didn't call on someone to be the heavy patient, and continued to use the size 0 girls.
We had to do a bed bath one day. I wasn't looking forward to doing this in real life just because it was awkward for the person, and for me. We had to practice on the dummy. The little princessy girls barely washed the dummy. I was thinking to myself, do you wash YOURSELF that way?! Cuz the way they were doing it wouldn't have gotten anyone clean. I can't even describe. Its like if you were brushing something lightly off a person. I jsut laughed in my head and thought, "I can't WAIT to see these girls when we go to the nursing home later this week!"
One of those days, I came in late with a job interview at a hospital. I had applied to 14 jobs at Jersey Shore medical center, all secretary jobs, since that's all I could do since I have no medical background. I got an interview in the social work department. I think its safe to say I didn't get the job since I haven't heard anything from them. I thought the interview went well and it'd be soooo nice to work at Jersey Shore since its like a mile from my house! It was 97 degrees that day and I had to wear a SUIT! Fun! Did the interview, and went to class 2hrs late. I was given homework =( bah! All we did that day was skills and watched old videos about safety , culture, diabetes, and stuff like that.
We then had to do the clinicals at the Nursing Home the final 3 days of the class. I wasn't looking forward to it, but just said I had to get thru it. We had to wear white scrubs , which I got at WalMart for 11.88 yo! lol Well, for each piece. We met in the lobby and I saw the look of sheer terror on the faces of the little princesses. The older people all stood in one area, and the younger ones were practically hyperventallating, saying "omg, I don't wanna do this!!! i sooooo dont' wanna do this!!!!"
First, we had an orientation with the Nursing Director, which was some big Sopranos type looking guy who talked in the "fuggedaboudit" style. He was like "WOW this is alotta people...so many people! We're not prepared with manuals!" He disappeared for a few min, and we knew he wasn't thrilled about having us here. He came back and went over some things about hte nursing home. How many people were there, the types of wings and units, the priviliges of the residents, the schedules, etc. As he was explaining, an old lady in bright pink sweats rolls her wheelchair into the lunchroom where we were and stops and stairs at us.
The director goes, "Whats up Franny!!! Where are you trying to get to?" She seemed amazed by all of us, and then tried to back her wheelchair out but had trouble. Eventually she got it, and continued to roam the nursing home in her chair. I saw her everyday wheeling around. She must be bored lol . An old man who still walked unassisted walked down the hall chasing a cat. Yes a cat. Apparently they have cats living there, and rabbits and birds. The old man was yelling "C'mere kitty! C'mere kitty! Ah for Pete's sake, C'MERE already! Lousy cat!" LMAO. After it was all done, it was time to get into our groups and get our patients.
There were 5 nurses who were our instructors. And they each got 6 people per nurse. So me and the older people (who I found out were between the ages of 25-31, all married w/ kids *sigh*) got Ruth, and we got assigned our patient. My patient needed 2 people so I got paired up with this girl Margerat, who lives in Howell. We assumed our patient was either a bitch, or really fat. Either way, Margerat and I were both tall and stronger than the lil' size 0 girls, so I thought between the 2 of us, we'd get the job done.
We were warned about the temperature of nursing homes. The rooms could be 85 degrees since old people are always cold. My grandmother was in a nursing home in her last few years, but I dont' recall how hot/cold it was. I'm now grandparentless, so I have no reason to go to a nursing home, altho i'm sure my dad will end up in one eventually. he stilll gets around surprisingly but he should walk more often so he doesn't become immobile. He probably wouldn't care cuz all he does is sit on h is ass and watches the History Channel all day anyway. but being immobile would make his nightly Dunkin Donuts run a lil' more difficult, don'tcha think?
We get our patient, and she's knocked out. zzzzzzzzzz. She's big. Great. I just say to myself, 'lets just get this over with!" So I wake her up and ask her the necc questions we were told to ask. Has she eaten. Does she want to use the bathroom, or does she wear diapers, does she have dentures or her own teeth.... So she HAD her own teeth, and was a diaper wearer. yay! *sarcasm* She ate and we told her we had to give her a bed bath, and she didnt' seem to mind. So it was less awkward. It was really HOT in that room. I didn't see the thermostat, but both me and my partner's foreheads were dripping with sweat. We had to change the diaper and had trouble rolling her on her side. Its def the hardest part. She was kinda immobile and heavy. It took us probably 20 min to get the full diaper change complated.
Whew. After that, we dressed her, another tough job since she was heavy and immobile, and put her in her wheelchair. She was scheduled to get her hair did, and she was late for the appointment because of us. We thought we'd be the last ones done. We were WRONG!
After we reported to our nurse, we were told to help some of the ''younger girls''. I knew what she was getting at. I looked down to the B wing (I was in the A wing) and I saw a few size 0 girls looking for the nurses, freaking out. They had no idea what to do. Granted some of the patients are hard to move but she was freaking the hell out. I heard alot of OMG OMG's. I got moved to a room w/ another young girl. She wans't freaking otu tho'. Her old lady was comatose and skinny and frail but so hard to move. Her muscles were contracted, which happens when their muscles aren't used after a stroke. They're supposed to do range of motion exercises with them by moving the arms and legs and fingers and toes for them but apparently that wasn't done on this lady. She needed help moving and dressing her. The old lady mustve been 5ft tall and 90lbs but she was like a deadweight! So I helpd her get dressed and put her in her wheely bed thing. The other girl took her to the activity room and that was it.
Afterwards, we met at the desk in our wing and everyone was like 'how was it?' We said it was ok. Not as bad as we had thought, and the little princessy girls were like ''OMG!!! It was HORRIBLE!!!!" They said their patients didn't talk to them, or gave them dirty looks, or they had a really dirty diaper, or whatevs. We had an hour for lunch that day. I had to make some job calls and then I ate my trusty granola bar again. Yum. We then had class for a few more hours at Brookdale (well its satellite campus) and went home.
The next day we had a new patient. An arabic man. He was skinny and mobile and cooperative. We were told he LOVESSSSS women. I pictured my dad for a sec, and wanted to get that pic outta my head, especially if we had to bathe the guy! I was paired up with Margaret again, but I didn't mind having someone to talk to. Most of the size 0 princessy girls were by themselves w/ their own patients. This guy we had was nice. He was in isolation though so we had to wear gloves, masks, and a gown. He was very cooperative and easy to do. He asked if I was saudi and said i looked like a saudi princess. lmao probably cuz we wore masks and it looked like a veil or something. Afterwards, we were sent to help the young princessy girls again who were freakingout and struggling. I got assigned to the same girl again w/ the comatose old lady. Was pretty easy. Then an early lunch.
The last day of the nursing home, we got a new patient, she looked scared. We got her done prettty quickly and then were free to go once again. Then back to class for the exam, and we were done.
The nursing home bathrooms were kinda dirty and they were running out of EVERYTHING! Toothpaste, lotion, powder, eye cream. Most of the old people were supposed to go to the activity room after they were up and dressed. There was nothing going on there. It was a room where most of them fell asleep in their wheelchairs at tables. Some old men played cards or dominos. Most just dozed off. Regis and Kelly was playing in the background. How incredibly boring! I felt sorry for them. I nkow most of them couldn't get around anymore but to wheel em in a room and just leave em there seems so neglectful.
There was another activity room with trivia going on. We listened to that one. Thats the room where the cats and rabbits were kept. A woman just kept asking trivia questions and old men would shout out the answers as if they were in school. They were told to "raise their hand" instead. LOL
All in all, the clinicals weren't too bad. I know in a year and a half (*slaps forehead at the long wait*), when I do the real clinicals it'll be alot more blood and gore. But to me, I have no problem looking at a wound. But looking at a dirty diaper is more gross. But I did it. I just think of them as big kids. I actually learned alot about nursing and medical stuff in general, like symptoms of certain diseases and stuff like that. I can't wait to actually do the nursing clinicals. This class was a prerequisite to get into the nursing program. I would be able to work as a home health aide, but they only get paid $10/hr. I'd be screwing myself over if I did that. I make more on my untaxed UE. But the tax is the problem. I owe the IRS, and I'm still on UE. I really hope I find a feasible job SOON! One that at least pays enough to pay everything and have something left over. But unfortunately, that has not been possible due to the drop in salaries across the board. Its gonna be a long road to becoming a nurse. I'm slated to take the non nursing courses now, while I'm waiting. But the clinicals, I dont think you can take the nursing classes all at once. I think you hae to finish one before you take the next. If this is the case, I'll never be done. You usually mix nursing classes w/ eng, psych, humanities, etc. But I'll be done w/ those by spring. Dunno what's gonna happen, but I definitely can't wait to get into the actual program. I hope I can persuade them to get me in sooner based on need of a job in the field. Alot of people are younger, live w/ mommy and daddy and will be OK. I can't be on UE forever. The longer I'm on it, the more stressed I am, and the more problems I encounter due to low income. And not to mention racking up my IRS debt. If I claimed taxes, I couldn't survive. So I have no choice. I will keep applying at hospitals as a secretary with the hopes of getting a job that DOES pay the bills if anything. Having had the nursing class gives me a little more of an edge over the typical job applicant, although less than people who've worked in hospitals.
Everyone I know who's going into nursing will definitely finish before me since my school has a ridic wait, and I have to work/temp full time (but will be taking Sept-Dec off unless i get a job by next week. HA!). I envy the little princessy girls. They can persue this with out a care in the world. They have no bills to pay, no landlord who can kick them out if they're not paid on time, probably no car payment, and I doubt they pay cable and cell phone bills) Ah what it msut be like to live as them. I do envy them like you wouldn't believe. Its so hard to work and go to school. I'm lucky I can do one semester fulltime, but I won't have enough UE to make it through the duration of nursing school. I wish I did. Maybe Obama will come up with more extensions due to high unemployment rates. As of now, I'll do what I can I guess. I hope to read about everyone ELSE'S experiences now, since they will far surpass me in school. I wanna know what is coming.
Thats all. Proabably nothing more on this topic til I get in the nursing program, cuz from here on out, its all general classes.
